He's gone to me now. Where do we go from here....?

Like so many other things in life, Mr. Charles is gone. He left yesterday afternoon while I was at work. He called me to tell me that he was at the airport and he would be boarding in ten minutes.

On what would be our last night together for what seems to be a few weeks at the least he gave me a scarf of his that he cares about. He asked me to hold on to it so I could either mail it back if I wanted, or keep it until he returns to get it back. Most don't know that he's left as of now, and I think those who'd want to know will find out as time progresses. I miss him already though.

And as much as I want to be with him and only him, I constantly remind myself that his heart is just not ready for that kind of commitment. And even if he was, I wouldn't be with him anyway. I keep my heart very guarded, and I won't walk into a situation where I could get hurt. He has a lot of baggage from the last relationship he was in, and there has not been enough time in between for him to move past some of it. So where does that leave me?

I am focusing on myself and the things I have going for me. My job, health, friends, writing, family, and all of those other positive things I sometimes forget I have. When he comes back, we can see where we left off. But Ms. Dimes waits on NO MAN and that's how it'll stay.

Coming up on next blog: more juicy goodness.

Until then: ladies keep those legs up (for a worthy man, of course), and fellas keep your shit straight.

Friends with benefits: watch out for the toxic landmines!

So, let's talk about friends with benefits. You know what I mean here. That guy or girl (or, nowadays, a combo of the two) that are good enough to sleep with, but not really someone you want to commit to. Why do people get into those kinds of relationships? Do they work?

I have several friends who are involved in a friends with benefits relationship. They get together, hang out, and fuck. (Or for the prudes out there, make love.) They seem to be happy, but are they really?

I asked that question of a lot of people, and I got a varied assortment of responses. The overwhelming majority of people said they can't work because someone always ends up getting attached to the other person. They want more time, affection, commitment, and all of those other wonderful things that happen when you start to fall for someone and want them to yourself.

Let's look at both sides of the coin. Say you are the person who wants to keep the relationship strictly sexual. What's holding you back? Afraid you may become heartbroken? Or do you not want to forgo an awesome sexual relationship for a romantic one that may ultimately fail?

And what about the person with feelings? Does the person you have feelings for deserve to have you? Or do some people (and most would say this applies to woman mainly) feel that you can't have sex without a level of emotional attachment applied to it?

I am currently involved in a friends with relationship cat and mouse game right now, and I am the one with feelings. I empathize with all my fellow romantic hopefuls out there. I can't escape him in my thoughts. In the beginning I thought that we were just casual lovers and things would remain purely sexual because he had a relationship and all of that. But here I am a few months later, and I enjoy being with him. He makes me laugh, and he's kind.

This has taken hold of me so much so that I don't even look at or flirt with any other men. (And believe me when I say I love nothing more then the hunt for men.) So, I am at a standstill with Mr. Charles. Am I waiting for the inevitable heartbreak that comes when you fall for someone? Even when you know he's emotionally unavailable? Or do I do what I keep doing and wait for him?

So it goes.....

The countdown of my final hours with Charles...

Sorry I haven't been around friends, readers and non-sexual (but still sexy) lovers. Work has been a killer this week, and that has been my major focus. I promise that I will be writing a blog chock full of wonderfulness soon.

On the dating front, Mr. Charles found work and he isn't leaving anymore. So that means there are no more hurdles, and he and I are really going to do this. He said that he didn't want to leave because of his off-spring, and because of me. "There's something there with you and me, and I don't want to leave that or you behind."

My jaw hit the floor. Not because of what he said, but because of what it means.

Stay tuned to see what happens next.


Your queen on the scene,


Ms. Dimes


P.S. Birthday is less than a month away. I'll be 25 years young!

Cheating is as cheating does...

So, lets discuss cheating. The topic of so many episodes of Maury, Jerry Springer (you know you love it), and celebrity rag magazines it'll make your head spin. It's everywhere, and yet, still so very taboo. It's fascinating until it happens to you, and then you're fucked. Or, comically, doing the fucking. Now, allow me to say that I have never been cheated on, but I have been the other woman. In this last year alone, so many people I know have been cheaters, been cheated on, or they were conspirators in the sneaky game of getting down on the sly.

In my experience, the guys who cheat on their girlfriends with me did it out of unhappiness. Well, that's the primary reason. Some of them do it because they want a boost to their self esteem, or they want to be predators and sleep with as many women as possible. Or maybe, they were just scratching an itch.

So, in that sex survey I created, the very first question I came up with was "When is cheating acceptable?". Most people who took the survey said that it's never acceptable. I think you need different people for different things. No one person can be all the things you need. We humans are an interesting breed. We all have this natural urge to mate with things that stir us up sexually, but monogamy is viewed as a necessary practice by most of society.

And let us not even get into the religious aspects or other pressures that come with monogamy. Let me give you two examples of cheating, and you decide for yourself what is wrong and right.

Example number one involves my parental units. They were together forever, and they even came to the states together in 1981. They built a home for myself and all of my siblings, and did the best they could with what they had. But, Father cheated on Mother the whole time they were together. My mother knew about it, and it was even the cause of a few mild separations between them. Theirs was not a relationship built on love. In truth, they stayed together "for their children". It was my mother's thought that she had to stay with him because our lives would be better for it.

Let me let that irony sink in for you. Yeah, that's right. So, was my mother right? Is cheating acceptable depending if their or children or financial concerns to consider?

Now, example two is more personal. Let's take a trip down I-can't-believe-I-slept-with-that-guy Boulevard. (I love flashbacks and montages. Can I get my soft piano music to lead me in?)

A few months ago I met this guy through some friends. We've been neighbors for years, and we never met. Let's call him.......Charles. Charles is the ultimate source of sexual attraction. Basically, I wanted to rip his clothes off and do the dirty. Charles was a taken man, however. Most women would back off. Most women suck.

This woman went after him like Oprah Winfrey at a buffet. As a single woman, I make it a point to be selective about the men I date. This girl has standards. Or as my friend Stephy tells it - I'm picky. Yes, I admit there are some men I am simply not attracted to. (Why bother getting to know some guy if he's only going to be Mr. Good For Five Minutes?) But, back to my point.

I found myself swerving towards him. The spark was undeniable, and it's been a hell of a ride. But, the acts were selfish. I found myself trying to identify with her feelings, and I couldn't. So, were we wrong? Or should we indulge in passion?

So, is cheating bad? Or is it cheating is as cheating does?

Blogging for the very first time! I'm a virgin again!

Hello friends, family, former lovers, pending fucks, and anonymous people who enjoy reading blogs about people they know nothing about! My name is Marsha and I come from the great (or, if you've been watching the news in the last eight years) and shitty state of Florida. I live in South Florida to be precise. I am a natural born Floridian as well. Let's go through the quick bio of who I am and what I do.

I am twenty-four years young, and I work as a Sr. Production Account Manager for an up-and-coming t.v. production company. I love what I do, but my real passions are music and writing. And of course, sex. (But who doesn't love a little sex, hmmm?) I am currently writing a questionnaire on sex and relationships, and the majority of my friends have done the survey, but I wanted to take it world wide. Everyone dates, has sex, and has all sorts of relationships. (And if you don't, you're a nun, and you shouldn't be reading this anyway!) Before some asshole comes along and asks me what makes me qualified to write a blog about dating and relationships, I'll tell you.

Are you ready? Here it is: I can, because I say I can. Beat that, bitch. :)

Being a young woman in her 20s I have been through my fair share of dating drama, but that's only been in the last few years or so. Before I hit the age of twenty-one and lost my virginity (which sucked), I was like any other average girl saving it for marriage. I thought my Prince Charming would come along and sweep me off my feet and make me adore the ground he walked on. Truth be told, most men are assholes and I am getting better at spotting one a mile away.

There are different types of girls in this world, and I'll tell you which one I am. I am the Other Woman Girl. What does that mean? I am the girl that guys in relationships want to sleep with because their current beau sucks more than a Milli Vanilli reunion. (And yes I know the one guy is dead and that joke may be in poor taste, but fuck it. If you actually liked them you're an asshole anyway.) Off and on over the years, I have slept with or hooked up with at least 5 guys that I know had girlfriends. I am sure someone is going to comment that I am a home wrecker or some shit, but fuck that line of thinking.

If your boyfriend or girlfriend is going to cheat on you, chances are there is something wrong there anyway. But, I am getting ahead of myself. Back to me, and how fabulous I am. (Yes, I am shallow, but only minimally. Wait, that sounds bad. Make that, I am pleasantly shallow.)

I am a college and high school graduate, and I am the fifth out of six kids. I love food, but I hate gaining weight. I love movies, but I hated The Happening. (But then again, who didn't?) I love television, but if I have to see one more Real World season I'll kill myself. (And if I kill myself, how will you enjoy my ever so fabulous blogs?)

I want this blog to be an avenue for people to express themselves honestly, because I will. I am going to be as candid and open with the questions and my thoughts and stories as I can be, so don't be afraid to let it all out there. Just make sure that it's nothing smaller than 6 inches if you're a guy. And if you're a lady, put those things away before I blush.

Sock it to me and stay tuned!